Thursday, December 19, 2013

Rachel Zoe pre-fall 2014


WORD!! Listen Rachel, it  has come to my attention that you just presented another collection … well a new group of supposedly seasonal clothes that represent the newest season .. Pre-Fall 2014. Now, here’s the rub doll… WTF are you thinking?

 

Everybody knows that eventually you would lose a lot of traction if you stuck to your guns and kept producing Zoebot clothes and alas, your future has been cast. When the critics, including myself, dismiss you as tired and hackneyed, well honey, it is time to either find someone new to reference or get yourself a new designer or really .. Just get out of Dodge!

 

Facts are facts and the biggest factor here is that no one needs these yawn worthy clothes and am guessing no one wants them either. If the past is proof, then the future is looking grim unless you call telemarketing your lifelong goal. This all brings to mind that one’s 15 minutes is almost expired and has probably lasted 15 minutes longer than it should have. It’ s ok doll, stay home, make babies., pray you don’t trip over your pants or fall off your passé platforms and keep playing dress up with  your clients but the is part of the fashion  business will be no less without you.

 

It is an inexcusable offense these days to open a collection with an almost identical replica of a Chanel jacket and think it is okay. Even more reprehensible, is believing that this is part of “your look!” No…. it is part of Chanel’s look, not yours and those full legged puddling pants are over no matter what anyone tells you… they remind me of the 70s when everyone’s pants were shredded at the heel from being caught under the heels of their shoes. Enough with the peasant blouses, low slung pants, jumsuits and the second skin leggings, this is old or very Kardashian or very Mob Wives. There’s not an original thought in the lot! Jeez.. forgot to mention jumpers and don't mean sweaters or those willing to commit suicide...

So, missy, one might be wise and finish this part of your so called fashion life and close up shop and move on to Kohl’s and target, if they would have you, or face the ultimate disgrace of having ALL your remaining accounts dump your sorry ass collection rather than mark is down one last time.