Prada fall 2022

 Yawn! Talk about repetitious! Talk about unexciting... but good for them they will sell a jillion of those wife beaters and I’m sure more than their share of handbags and shoes... well the clothes... not so much. 

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Take away those web like paneled/banded skirts and dresses and you’re left with leather that looked thick and cheap, hairy or feathered armband coats, Annie Hall boyfriend blazers, some LBDs that look like they may have been made from bonded fabrics or of odd proportions and of course fingertip sleeved and massaged bombers! God bless bombers, they are the supposed fashion pieces ... AGAIN! Lest I forget the ode to Dior and the new look suit which looked like they weighed 50 pounds!

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I don’t even want to read what the so-called pundits or the designers will have to say but I would like to say... I mean a film that is 40 minutes long and slightly more than half of it is people posing in their Prada as they arrive ... HUBRIS!!!! You know so many if not all of them were given those pieces and it is a freakin fashion show not a Hollywood premiere.

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Credit where credit is due is that the models were perfectly coiffed and made up, it’s just too bad that the clothes didn’t live up to the look of the models

Prada fall 2022

So, here’s what I saw.... one size nylon coveralls, “rat” trimmed coats and jackets similar to what my aunts wore in the 50s and 60s or maybe reminding me of the Hasidim, a Gaultier French front blazer (hidden buttons), dolman sleeves, cinched waists, a decidedly older more mature casting, rifting on trench coats and bombers...

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AGAIN, scrunched up stove pipe pants... and nothing looking particularly worth the price of admission (if you catch my drift) and to wrap it up all neatly in a bow ... not a single original idea in the entire lot!... AGAIN! and lots and lots of nylon that will work as an alert system by the sound of it rustling when walk into a room! (You know when once upon a time you could hear a women’s thighs rubbing together when they wore stockings) or in orange when doing your hours of community service picking garbage along the roadside and lastly let’s talk about repetition over and over and over again.

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We won’t get into fit and fabrications as why bother? ... the twosome can go on their merry way philosophizing all about their inspirations and indulging in their intellectual word soup that they both love to dish out in copious amounts season after season.

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Prada fall 2021

Snippets from the 2 oracles of fashion:

Ease is the flip side of elegance and here I thought it’s constricted!

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Ease and movement were very important to us! I   hence “clutch” coats and stoles and multiple layers of clothes!... and oh yes ... the “wookie” coats!

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“optimism is mounting.” That’s a different take than she and Simons had a month ago in a similar situation following their fall 2021 men’s show (la Phelps). “optimism is mounting.” We don’t feel it’s right, now, to be too exuberant,” Simons said .... I say we feel more hopeful but there are still people dying every day and countries that are far behind in curbing this pandemic...........exuberant................. not by a long shot especially considering the body count!

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 Now....  clothes, yawn, onesies as a layering base more snooze worthy suits, and yes that big boxy yellow coat was it... there is really nothing to hate but then again there is hardly anything that will cause you to drop to your knees and scream hallelujah.... unless of course you’re a fan of silver dollar sized pearl buttons.... so, it’s more talk about the emperor’s new clothes but now as a duet.

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Let’s just say it looked better than usual less tricked out and more mournful and marmish in its own way and yes, a very long way from celebratory,

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To be rather coarse about it ... now they just jerk each other off and scream how fabulous each one of them is .... about themselves but not each other!

PRADA men’s fall 2021

 Here are my takeaways:  sleeves either pushed up to  bicep level or  long enough to  cover your fingertips, fabrics that look like they came from the 50’s like Naugahyde  and  bonded foam like solids,  bomber jackets again , odd  shaped mini cases  sewn on sleeves,  gloves or  center back of jackets, the overuse and desecration of a  logo, call then   catsuits, onesies, union  suits (call them what you will)  in  knits, some bright  colors,  high water pants and  puddling pants, silver  dollar sized pearl  buttons on  coats, lots of  double breasted, of  course lots of black and  oh yes… lots of  gloves…gotta sell something!

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These 2 self-appointed/anointed visionaries of fashion produced a so what collection of clothes where styling took the starring role and god knows I’m sure there is tons of blah blah blah to accompany the basically pedestrian collection but of course the rhetoric is as high minded as for a Rhodes scholar.

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I’ve never been a fan of Miuccia or Raf but at least she was a magician in terms of turning a handbag brand into a juggernaut while he is just a hired hand who fails each time.

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To me, it’s a non-collection... just another pile of supposedly trendy clothes that cost a fortune and in the general scheme of life as it means nothing!

As the police say at the scene of a crime when it’s taped off…keep on moving nothing to see here!

PRADA SPRING 2021

 Just when you thought that Prada couldn’t get more boring …  a great meeting of the intellectual minds took place and Miuccia and Raf combined their blah blah blah to create a tedious and pedestrian collection that highlights the “clutch coat,” (doesn’t everyone want one?)  the "egg" coat (another useful item) the fit n flare circle skirt and snug top and the triangular Prada logo slipped on some needless basics unless you wish to be a walking billboard for the brand.

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One can only imagine the esoterica and endless intellectual dissertations and diatribes that accompany and supposedly legitimize a collection that like this that is about as exciting as staring at grass growing, picking pet dander off a black sweater or watching paint dry. Yes, it’s relaxed, informal and I guess free of gimmicks and accessories but who cares because if these are 2 of the great designing minds then just send in the clowns and let’s call it a day or get yourself to a Zara or H&M pronto.

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PS there will be no unforgettable climax as in when Harry Met Sally!

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